Why these parents will never lie to their daughter about Santa

By Lydia Patrick via SWNS

Meet the parents who "refuse to lie" to their daughter about Santa and the tooth fairy and insist they're not "taking away any magic."

Mathew Bourdreaux, 46, and their spouse, Aurelian, 44, a music teacher, find "honesty is the best policy" when it comes to parenting.

Rather than insisting Father Christmas and the tooth fairy are real, the parents ask their daughter, Helena, nine, if she wants to play make-believe and pretend they're real.

But the schoolgirl knows Santa and the tooth fairy don't exist and her dads are playing along to keep her happy.

Mathew insists the family "don't want to participate in large scale global gaslighting" - making children question their own reality - and says the couple decided they "would never deceive" their little girl.

According to Mathew, lying to your children for years can cause psychological trauma when they eventually find out the truth.

“Parents don’t need to tell any of their kids Santa or the tooth fairy is real - why would I participate in this large scale global gaslighting?," said Mathew, a crafter, from Camas, Washington.

"Before adopting our child, we researched parenting and thought of the potential psychological impact lying could have.

“We decided we would never deceive her – parents don’t need to tell any of their kids this is real.

"It has normalized group lying and deception, it doesn't need to be a part of society."

The dad-of-one said their daughter didn't know whether Santa was real or not when she was little.

But when she reached the age of three, their daughter started asking questions about Santa.

They explained Santa wasn’t real and the stories behind the traditions, but they could carry on pretending if she wanted to.

"It wasn't a sit down conversation, she started to ask questions and have an awareness of him," Mathew said.

"She asked who he was and it's at this point most parents say he's real - we decided not to.

“From my perspective, we’re having a blast pretending.

“The magic never ends and pretend never ends - we decorate the house with homemade decorations, make cookies, exchange presents, get up super early and spend quality time together as a family."

The only mythical creatures the nine-year-old cares for are Santa and the tooth fairy - she doesn't ask her dads to make believe about the Easter bunny.

On the surface, their Christmas is the same as anyone else’s except their daughter is aware Santa isn’t real.

"We train children not to 'imagine' and by playing make-believe we can encourage them to use their imagination and creativity," Mathew said.

“There is a morality in lying and not lying - the second choice is the right choice.

“I’m not taking away any magic - I didn’t create this mess.”

Parents often ask why Mathew and Aurelian choose to tell Helena the truth about Santa and sometimes get aggressive in the comments on their videos on social media - refusing to listen to their response.

“By not lying, there is no lie to burst - we live in a world where nobody can tell the difference between real and fake,” Mathew said.

The dads hope to raise their daughter "to be humble and appreciative" so don’t spoil her rotten on Christmas day - instead giving her a handful of presents and celebrating being together as a family.

When it comes to the tooth fairy, Helena is aware Mathew is the one putting a dollar under her pillow, but she still finds it just as exciting.

“Honesty is the most important component of parenting, and the truth is the way you should go,” Mathew said.