This mom turned ChatGPT into her co-parent

By Emma Dunn

A mother turned ChatGPT into her co-parent - and says it transformed her daughter's bedtime routine after three years of struggling to get her to sleep.

Lilian Schmidt, 33, was struggling with the "mental load" of parenting her daughter, aged three, when she decided to start experimenting with the AI tool.

Now she has created her own bot - a co-parent for her and her partner, 35, - which can take on expert roles such as a nutritionist and behavioral expert.

She uses her 'co-parent' to write her shopping lists, meal plan, and it even helped revolutionize bedtimes for her daughter.

Lilian, a corporate brand strategist living in Zurich, Switzerland, said: "I've built my own bot to be our co-parent for both of us.

"I never let it make decisions, but I always it for advice.

"I use it to make me a better mum.

"I'd never go back."

Lilian and her partner, a financial controller, were struggling with "demanding" and "busy" lives - both working full-time jobs and looking after their toddler and Lilian's stepson, 14.

Lilian said, "Our life is so busy. The mental load is a lot.

"My partner is very involved with the kids and does his fair share.

"Our brains work differently - he's a doer and takes on the planning.

"I do the thinking - that mental load falls on me.

"I want to be a really good mum. I want to get things right."

Lilian was particularly struggling between 5 pm and 7 pm when she was drained from work.

She said: "I'm naturally at my lowest energy. Before kids, I could sit on the sofa, relax a little bit.

"5 pm has become the busiest time because I'm racing back from work, and I pick up an overwhelmed, overstimulated toddler.

"At the same time, I've got to get dinner ready. All coming together at the same time, it becomes overwhelming."

Lilian had been speaking to a colleague at work about ChatGPT and started experimenting with it in her personal life and became "obsessed" in February 2025.

She said, "I was annoyed with the basic answers.

"I thought it would be nice if it started thinking like me.

"I got into building bots - and got it to teach me to make a custom one."

The mom worked out that if she gave it a role in her prompt, it would give more detailed help.

She said, "I get it to act as an experienced toddler coach or a meal planner. I ask it to coach me through the process.

"If I need it to plan my meals, I'll ask it to assume the role of a nutritionist for healthy kid-friendly meals."

Now her custom bot remembers the roles and can assume them depending on the question she asks.

Lilian was able to use ChatGPT to improve her daughter's bedtime routine.

She said: "It was a huge frustration for years - since she was born, she was not a good sleeper.

"I asked ChatGPT to assume the role of a toddler therapist - someone who understands their development.

"I asked it 'help me understand why bedtime is hard for her'.

"It advised us to do the complete opposite and it worked.

"For the last nearly four years, we'd been told 'she needs to relax, calm down, nothing overstimulating'.

"But she'd never just lie down.

"ChatGPT told us she needs stimulating. Let her jump around on her bed.

"We've never once had a power struggle again. There are no tears or fights anymore. Within five to 10 minutes, she goes to bed."

Lilian also used it to help get her little girl to play independently - by getting it to suggest easy activities she can set up the night before - giving her the chance to sit down with a cup of coffee in the mornings.

Lilian does use it for emotional advice - but says it should never replace a therapist - as ChatGPT is designed to be a "people pleaser".

She said: "My daughter really pushes all my buttons sometimes and I lashed out at her.

"I took a moment to reflect and asked ChatGPT - why is it so triggering for me?

"It helps me deal with my own emotions.

"It's a place you can vent."

Lilian is now sharing what she has learnt with our parents on TikTok @heylilianschmidt and is building a custom co-parent for other moms and dads to use.

She said: "Our life is still not perfect - it's still busy.

"We still have tantrums but it's so much better and so much easier.

"[ChatGPT] is someone who will think for me - but it will never replace my partner.

"It's something that helps me make decisions and makes my life easier."

Lilian's tips

• Ask it to assume an expert role for what you're asking it to do. Eg. Be a nutritionist to help me plan easy, kid-friendly meals.
• Personalise it at the beginning and let it learn about you
• Be mindful of how you use it - don't give away any sensitive information you don't want out there
• Always seek out a professional for serious issues
• Use ChatGPT for advice but make your own decisions

Ways Lilian uses ChatGPT as a co-parent

• Meal planning/ shopping lists
• Planning birthday presents
• Helping her build a capsule wardrobe - so she can feel "confident" again
• With behaviour - eg. sleep routine, independent play
• Packing lists for holidays etc