Couple says swinging is ‘natural and normal’

By George Mathias via SWNS

A couple insist swinging is "natural and normal" and say the lifestyle is no longer just for "middle aged people."

Olivia, 31 and her partner, Gage, 32, have been together for 15 years.

They decided to spice up their relationship by swinging - engaging in casual or group sex with other people - seven years ago.

Gage, from Lincolnshire, said: "The term swinger has negative connotations.

"The lifestyle now has younger people, and it’s more tasteful.

"It's definitely not just for old or middle aged people - it’s for everyone. I have seen people in clubs in their early twenties all the way to people in their eighties."

Their swinging journey started when Olivia expressed a desire to sleep with women and spoke to Gage about it.

After chatting, the couple decided to explore their sexual desires together.

They meet people using their app or attending swinging events put on by clubs.

They sometimes play separately, sometimes together but say it's not a "week in week out thing, just whenever we get some free time and feel like we want to."

The couple - who run a swinging app together - now regularly hookup both with other couples and other people separately.

Olivia said: "The communication we have and the need for swinging has spilled over into everyday life.

"We communicate amazingly well with each other and that definitely makes for a stronger relationship.

"It’s a very bizarre feeling sleeping with someone else you get an intense hit of love and affection for your partner - it’s like being back in the honeymoon phase."

The pair say if one or both of them decided they wanted to step out of the lifestyle then that would be fine.

"We don’t need it to be happy and content it’s just an added bonus," Olivia said.

Olivia and Gage first met out in Leeds, West Yorkshire, when they were 15 and 16 respectively - romance blossomed and they became a couple.

But eight years into their relationship, Olivia told Gage she'd like to explore sleeping with women.

Olivia, who also works part-time as an air hostess, said: "We had a conversation a few times, and then kind of then it opened up more and we started talking about seeing people solo.

"But then when we both realized that we were up for it we decided to explore doing it together."

The couple then began speaking to another couple who were in an open relationship for six weeks online before arranging to meet up.

Olivia said: "The nerves were there but it was exciting as it was a new thing.

"I was absolutely terrified.

"I said to Gage I think we should turn the car back around, but once we’d met and had a drink, it was so natural and normal.

"It all flowed very nicely and there was no pressure to do anything."

The couple ended up having a foursome, with Olivia, who is bisexual and the woman "playing together" and her and the other woman also "swapping partners."

Olivia then had her own solo hookup a week later with another man.

"It kind of just kept going from there," she said.

The couple say the lifestyle draws people from "all walks of life".

Gage said: "We’ve been to parties and events before with doctors, solicitors, police officers, and paramedics – it's definitely not just for old people.

"People who have been married for years, they turn round thinking ‘we’re all human beings, we all have these fantasies and sexual desires, why can't we do it together a s a team?'"

The pair say swinging is an umbrella term for lots of different lifestyles.

“The term swinging is phasing out, people now tend to talk about open marriages or non–monogamous relationships,” Gage said.

The pair say the reality of swinging is different to how it is often portrayed in the media.

Gage said: "You socialize fully clothed at first - it's not like the Louis Theroux documentary.

"Some events we've been to have been black tie events or ball gown events in big mansions - there's a real variety."

The couple have appeared on multiple reality TV shows about the lifestyle including Open House and Sex Actually with Alice Levine, both on Channel 4, and Adults Only on Channel 5 - and believe the stigma around swinging is slowly disappearing.

They have done a "couples swap" on a cruise ship after clicking with another couple an ending up back at their room while they also visited resorts in the Dominican Republic and in Cancun, Mexico, with "free spirited and open to the possibility."

Olivia said: “Loads of people now are proud and are telling friends and family about the lifestyle.

"We like to try and educate people on what it's like, we're also open with our friends and family about it too."

Olivia and Gage are due to put on their first ever event this year involving some 300 swingers.

They also have plans to take their app - SwingHub, which has 20,000 users - global.

Gage said: "As soon as we went live five months ago we had so many people sign up.

"It just goes to show that it's perfectly normal to have these kinds of desires."